On… bad hair

I have bad hair. No, I really do. It’s thin. It breaks. It doesn’t hold color. When I’m knocked up it grows in darker. Then after I have the baby it all falls out. Then it breaks some more, and sometimes, for no reason, looks a little pink.

I’m on a constant quest to get huge 90s hair, you know, a giant flip-the-bird of attitude and awesomeness. So I tried to learn how to blow dry, I tried this and kind of liked it but not enough to keep it, and this is good too but I detest the smell so back it went, and this really works though it kind of makes your hair into cement. But all blowouts, and all products seem to only in my hair for like half a day, then it just looks shit again. I know. My load is heavy.

BUT. It turns out my problems started WAY before blowdrying. (True on so many levels.)

I needed to change conditioners.



Cleansing Conditioner by WEN.

I don’t know how it works and I don’t care enough to find out. Something to do with parabens. Whatever. The point is, you massage a giant glob of this into the bottom 3/4 of your hair in the shower, leave it for a minute or two while you shave your armpits and consider shaving your legs and then say nah fuck it I’m good, then massage it out. BOOM. Your hair will be awesome.  (By the way, those of you who have read this blog for a while know that every now and again I come on and I’m like DROP EVERYTHING GUYS I HAVE THE ANSWER TO ALL YOUR BEAUTY NEEDS and it’s never the answer, not really, but it’s the answer for now. And as with everything I like most, I enjoy the process. Otherwise, what’s the point of anything? Anyway, try this stuff if you want to, and if not, that’s okay too.)

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6 thoughts on “On… bad hair

  1. Kate

    I think I saw about a million of the infomercials for this & totally did not believe it….!
    But. Have you tried one of those heated rolling hair brush gizmos?
    Because I have fine thin frizzy hair AND THIS HAS SERIOUSLY CHANGED MY (HAIR) LIFE.
    I have been through 3 of them and can never imagine not having one. I may have exaggerated on how many times I’ve seen the Wen infomercial but I’m totally seriously serious about this.
    It’s Babyliss in the UK, Vidal Sassoon branded in Aus. Not sure about the US > http://www.babyliss.co.uk/new-big-hair-50mm.html

    1. GemmaBurgess Post author

      One of my friends is is obsessed with that too!! Okay. I will see if I can find an American equivalent…

  2. Sarah

    I too have shit hair. I’m so lazy, I wear it in a low bun most days. I like to think that I look like a chic, off-duty ballerina when, in actual fact, this style simply highlights my dark roots and lack of volume. Anyway. I have ordered some of this Wen conditioner you speak of. So help me god, it better change my life!!

    1. GemmaBurgess Post author

      I’m EXACTLY like you – low bun, off-duty ballerina I hope but actually more like Marilla from Anne Of Green Gables. ANYWAY. How did the conditioner work out for you?


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